Author: chadkuhn

Operation: “Add a Kuhn” Falls into Place

October 22, 2013 chadkuhn No Comments Adoption, Life

Where do I start? So much has happened since I last posted in July. Most of it was completely expected. Summer vacations came to an end. I crammed to get ready for my new position as Computer Science teacher in the middle school. Ryan went to both new student orientations (so he could see as many people as possible before school started). Joel and Miles got letters in the mail from their new teachers. Rachel continued with a few cross-country trips to meet with her team.

Some of it was not expected. Not yet. On the second day of school, I got a call during my plan time. The agency had a birth mother who had seen our profile and wanted to meet with us. The next day. Or in eleven days on Labor Day. Well, it turned out that Rachel had a flight out the next day, so we had to wait. We waited, hoping that we weren’t missing out, hoping that she wasn’t meeting with other adoptive parents.

Miles’ old room is quickly becoming the nursery

On Labor Day, we left our boys with my parents at our extended family gathering and drove off for a meeting. I won’t go into all the details, but we met the birth mother and liked her. And she liked us. She was in a tough situation and knew that she would not be able to raise the baby herself. She asked if we wanted to know if it was a boy or girl, and seemed excited to tell us that she wanted to place her baby girl with us. (We had submitted our profile, and she had picked us to interview all before she knew the gender.)

We drove home, heads spinning, as we began to imagine what our fall would be like. We prayed that God would guide and that He would provide. A few more pieces of paperwork later and we were matched. An official announcement was made on the agency’s Facebook page, and we continued to plan for how our house our home would look with a baby girl in it.

I shared recently that God has impressed on me that Christianity is manifested in Love and when I read the New Testament I see Love manifested in Generosity. We went into this in February saying that God had called us to give a family, and now we have been blessed to have family and friends stand beside us in generosity as we prepare to do that. We have quite the baby clothes collection and are almost done accumulating the baby furniture. All this at very little cost to us.

Now, with about a month to go, our biggest need is what it has always been: prayer. Please pray with us and for us as we prepare to be the parents of a girl for the first time and of a baby for the first time in eight years. Pray for the grant applications we have sent out, to help cover the cost we have already paid, and the cost we have coming up. Pray about giving towards our adoption costs or joining our financial support team as Rachel continues to send missionaries to South America. Pray for the birth mother, that God will protect her heart and that this adoption will be a positive thing for her, a turning point in her life as God pursues her like He does us all.

Thank you for your support, for the kind words of encouragement and the gifts of onesies, changing pads and hand-me-downs, etc. etc.

As another friend shared today, if you are interested in the process, if you feel God tugging at your heart to open your home and family to foster or adopt, we’d be glad to share our story in detail. Our agency just emailed that they have six more situations this week. There is always a need for people who can adopt.

30-Minute Epic Fail

September 19, 2013 chadkuhn No Comments Funny, Life

About three weeks ago I had a horrible half-hour. It all started when I didn’t have enough deck boards to finish the top-rail on my deck. I loaded up my three sons and headed to Westerville to pick up a few boards at The Home Depot. I exchanged a few items I didn’t need, grabbed the boards I did need and headed to the parking lot to load up.

One twelve foot deck board would fit in the van perfectly, from the dash up front, across the back bench seat to the back hatch. The second twelve-footer was just a bit too long because of the angle of the windshield. Looking back, I realize I could have placed the boards side by side and been on my way with no problems. Instead, I acted quickly. If the boards were too long, I’d have to change the angle of the boards to get them to fit.  I immediately grabbed the latch to fold the seat down, but I forgot to pull the boards back first. As the back of the boards dropped down, the front of the boards levered up, pushing into my windshield and producing a loud, “Crack!” I looked to the front of the van and saw spider crack going at least twelve inches in all  directions.

#Fail.

My windshield while still in the parking lot

#DoubleFail.

A phone call on the way home confirmed that the window was not reparable. I felt sick to my stomach as I drove the 30 minutes home. As I pulled into the driveway, my first thought was to get the stupid boards out of the van as soon as possible and then to pull out my insurance policy to check my liability. I threw the van in park, grabbed my phone and jumped out of the van. As I bailed out of the van, I hit my phone on the steering wheel and it was knocked from my hand. My two-week old Galaxy SIII flipped through the air in slow-motion before it landed face down in the gravel drive-way. Two cracked pieces of glass in one half-hour.

I felt like a complete idiot, who had just wasted a bunch of money that we really didn’t have. It took me a while, but I remembered that I am not my mistakes. I’m not worth any less because a couple things went really, really wrong. I’m still a dad and a husband and a teacher. I’m still me, and I like that most of the time.

Fortunately, the bill for the windshield was less than I expected and I was able to replace the glass on my phone for less than $15. Like usual, things weren’t as bad as they first seemed.

What about you? Have you ever had a string of misfortune? How did you react? How long did it affect you?

Lazy Preaching

July 3, 2013 chadkuhn No Comments Life

In my travels this summer I’ve heard several sermons from different preachers. Some were good, some were great; some were… not. I expect a pastor to have studied the scripture, connected it to other scriptures, carefully considered the original context and thoughtfully and prayerfully crafted a message that brings practical application to the congregation. Some, however just don’t. Some appear to give the passage a brief skimming then focus on a line or two of scripture, then spend their creative energies trying to conform the passage to their own agenda. Some ignore the context and message all together, and instead of trying to enlighten, encourage or instruct the listener, they try to entertain, making jokes at every turn, apparently judging the success of the message with a laugh-o-meter.

One particular sermon sticks in my craw. The “text” was presented as being from Philippians 2:5-11, an amazing instructional passage encouraging the Philippians to give up vain ambitions, to serve selflessly, following the example of Christ. The pastor instead, used only the line, “Have the mind of Christ,” in his sermon and used it to push a legalistic agenda. He glorified church attendance and Bible reading, as an end not a means. He used anecdotes to lift up the example of a friend who was most of the time “away from the Lord,” but made his kids go to bed at 10 on Saturdays so they could be in church.  Because that’s the way it should be. He told us to read the Bible daily, because we brush our teeth daily. Not to grow, not to learn, not for the joy of developing a relationship with our Creator and Savior. Just because we should…. “have the mind of Christ,” and Christ did what was expected of him. The only other thing I remember was that he hinted strongly that parents should (be able to) spank and asked for “Amens,” repeatedly.

Now, none of these “points” is wrong. We should want to be in communion with other believers and are encouraged by the writer of Hebrews not to “give up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but encourage one another.” (10:25) However, nothing in this scripture commands us to be in church “every time the doors are open.”  When preached without the joy of community, this reeks of Pharisaical legalism. Reading the Bible daily issomething we should do, not as a chore; not as we brush our teeth, but with delight. Psalm 1:1-2 tells us, “Blessed is the one… whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on it day and night.” This delight in God’s law reminds me of a fiction buff’s passion for reading, a stat head’s propensity for crunching numbers. The meditation reminds me of the way I look at my wife, considering every freckle, the little scar on her cheek, the sparkle in her blue eyes when she catches me looking at her and smiles back. We should delight in God’s Word to us and meditate on it as we gaze into the eyes of a lover, not endure it as we brush, floss and gargle at the sink for five minutes before bed. As for corporal punishment, discipline is necessary and the Proverbs 13:24 tells us, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them,” but how does discipline and spanking fit with a text on humility?

Someone apparently spent less than five minutes with this scripture and missed out. He missed out on Christ’s humility that led him to wash his disciples feet. (John 13:4-17) He missed out that this whole passage about having the mind of Christ, isn’t really about obedience, but about peace, fellowship and love through humility, servant-hood and sacrifice. He missed out, as did everyone who laughed at the jokes, and everyone who amen-ed when prompted, and everyone who left church thinking they had been fed.

When pastors present the Word with such haphazard irreverence, presenting their agenda rather than revelation, they set themselves on a pedestal. They disrespect the Word, and the One who sent it, contradicting Philippians 2:3 “Don’t try to impress others.” They would be better off to read the scripture and sit down. John 13:16 tells us that after Jesus washed the disciples’ feet he told them, “Nor is the messenger greater than the one who sends the message.”  And James 3:1 cautions us, “Dear brothers and sisters, not many of you should become teachers in the church, for we who teach will be judged more strictly.”

On a positive note, such lazy preaching has motivated me to read closer with more intention, to delight in and meditate on the Word of God.

Operation: Add a Kuhn

June 28, 2013 chadkuhn No Comments Adoption, Life

Rachel just announced publicly on Facebook that we are adopting and have just finished an approved home-study and are now heading into the waiting stage to be matched. With that info completely public now, here is what I wrote about the process when we were about 5 weeks into actively pursuing adoption, on March 14, 2013.

How did we get here? How did we decide that our fairly comfortable life with 3 boys in a nice house needed to have a baby in it? How did that happen?

It’s quite simple. And quite complex. The simple answer is that God called us to this. The complex answer includes thoughts and emotions, it involves obedience and a couple babies, it involves a sermon and some role models and story sharing. The complex answer is, well, complex.

Last summer Rachel called me from Africa, in tears she told me that God had asked her (us) to say, “Yes.” We’ve tried to make a habit of saying yes. Saying yes took us to Kansas City Missouri right out of college. Saying yes brought us back to Ohio almost 7 years later. But this time we didn’t know what saying yes meant. It was scary and hard.

So we said yes in the little things. We took more time to pray together. We became more intentional about seeking God’s will and saying, “Yes,” in the small things. And we waited.

Then Rachel spoke at a church where a grandmother had guardianship of her 2 week-old grandson, and the entire afternoon Jaquan was either in my arms or Rachel’s. On the way home we looked at each other and said something like, “Wow. We could have just taken that boy home for good. He probably needs it, and we could do that.”

Christmas came around. This season has caused me increasing discomfort in recent years, as I see all the stuff we have, all the stuff that isn’t really used. I hear the boys say, “I want one of those!” and I cringe at the materialistic sound of it. I hear myself say, “Man I need some new running shoes, and lights to run with, and a new phone would be awesome,” and I cringe.

Then Rachel brought up the idea of really giving at Christmas. We took a large portion of what we usually spend on the boys, and we asked them to help us spend it on some kids the school social worker told us would not be getting much of a Christmas. We prayed for the kids and we dreamed of what we could give them. We shopped and purchased and wrapped. Giving at Christmas that year was amazing. It moved giving to the forefront of our minds.

In January our church had a Sanctity of Life service. Much of the service was about why abortion is wrong, and I admit, I checked out a little bit, feeling there wasn’t much in the sermon for me act on. Then the Pastor challenged us to make a difference.

“Don’t be obnoxious and picket, be forgiving and compassionate.”
Ok, no problem- I think.

“Pray for and support the local pregnancy center.”
I get those emails. I pray. Money is harder to come by.

“Adopt if you can.”
Whoa! Jaquan immediately came to my mind, and I thought, “We could do that.”

The service continued with the story of Steve and Joy, of their heart wrenching loss of three babies, before their adoption of a little girl. Again I was moved and felt the encouraging thought, “We could do that.”I was pretty quiet about what I was feeling in my heart. Then in early January, our nephew Parker was born. Unfortunately his big brother, Landon had been through a series of infections and the doctor wanted them separate for a while, so two week-old Parker came to our house for five days. Suddenly we were changing diapers and getting up in the night to fix bottles. Rachel and I looked at each other and said, “We can do this. Again”A few days after Parker went home, my activator of a wife was checking out adoption agencies online. “We can do that,” had become, “We want to do that,” and “God want us to do that.” As she read testimonials on websites, I repeatedly heard some form of, “Our family just didn’t feel complete.” I told Rachel that I didn’t feel like that at all. I don’t feel an empty spot in our family where a baby is supposed to be. I’m not saying that others are not perfectly correct in saying they feel that way. I’m saying I don’t. I just feel God leading us to give, like He did at Christmas. Except now we are to give a family.

Now, every step we take towards giving someone a family feels right, and each leads my heart to having a open spot, a spot for our someday child.

Marshall Half-Marathon

November 9, 2010 chadkuhn No Comments Uncategorized

or the Herald-Dispatch Half as I found it was called.

I am beginning to think that I am a spoiled racer.  Let me explain.  I ran my first race in the CapCity Half in Columbus, an amazingly well run race with week long packet pickup, clearly marked course, scores of volunteers, great post-race food and services.  I followed that race with the USAF Marathon at Wright-Pat and I’d have to say the armed services know what they are doing when they plan an event.  From pre-race flyover to loads of post-race food like Rosa’s pizza, chocolate milk, oranges, bananas and more; from officers saluting at every turn to themed aid stations, from Air Force planes lining the homestretch to busses shuttleing between parking and start line (AND BACK!) this race was planned to a t- and fun.  Those two races set the bar high and those that followed have not lived up to my expectations.

Next, I ran a small half in Dublin, Ohio.  It was okay, a one-mile loop, with some decent pizza and good fruit.  Then came the Kentucky Derby Festival Marathon, a mess of a race.  We parked more than a mile from the finish then caught a bus to the start.  No buses were available to get runners back to their vehicles.  6 miles of the race were in Indiana through trashy neighborhoods with no scenery, on dirty streets with unenthusiastic aid stations.  And just recently, I ran a half in Huntington, where the pre-race packet was my shirt and bib (with nary a pin to fasten the bib).  The spaghetti meal was included in the registration, but the “expo” was a table with one person selling GU.  We were very pleased to find the “expo” as the only sign for it was at the door, in the center of the block, where is was not visible from the street.

  1. 7.51- We started at the gun.  My brothers and I began shuffling forward, waiting for the start line to start our watches and begin to “run” the race.  Eventually, like those around us, we realized their was no start line, no place for our chip times to be started.  Thus, our splits and watch times were a little further than normal. Not a bad first mile, right where I wanted to be actually.
  2. 7.21- Started shaving seconds off the average pace a little faster than a planned.
  3. 7.37- Started to warm up and relax and enjoy the race.
  4. 7.32- Settled into a pace I hoped I could hold longer than I did.
  5. 7.50- Back and forth, the miles seemed to be going back and forth, slower then faster.
  6. 7.34- Here’s the last mile that actually went fast.  Jason and Andrew were struggling, and a couple of “experienced” runners passed us at the beginning of the mile.  (By experienced, I mean they were about ten years older than me, but definitely had a light build than me and seemed to be cruising along effortlessly.)  I drafted behind them for a mile then began to fall back as we hit a tiny bit of an incline.
  7. 9.25 (1.18 miles @7.59)  Jason and Andrew caught up with me and we all missed hitting our split button on this mile.  More than half way done and we were hitting an 8 minute pace.  The total pace was still around 7:45)
  8. 6.32 (0.81 miles @7.58)
  9. 8.04- On this mile, I began to fall back behind my younger brothers then make mini charges to catch up.  I also shed my outer layer and was down to a long-sleeved tech-shirt and short-sleeved tech-shirt.
  10. 8.12- Now the game was to hold on the best I could and try to make a push over the last mile and a half to two miles.
  11. 8.06- A better mile here, as Jason began to pull away from me and Andrew from him.
  12. 8.19-  The guys moved just out of sight here and I struggled a bit to hold the pace.  Throughout the race I never had any specific physical ailments, but at this point the legs were getting quite heavy.
  13. 8.16-   Two mistakes were made here.  First, I began to kick it up a notch for the finish at 12.5 instead of 13.0; I thought the stadium was just around the corner.  After I recovered from my early charge and began to move better, I missed a turn that was unmarked because the volunteer had left her station.  I had to turn around and re-pass several runners that I had just passed.  It was a devastating development to my motivation at that point.
  14. 1.19 (0.17 miles @7.22)  Motivation returned as I entered the stadium, ran almost half a lap, received a football and mustered my best 100 yard sprint to the finish line with the ball tucked under arm.

*I just looked for a picture or two to add to this post.  I found out that the Marathon and Half Marathon had only two photographers at two locations taking and posting 1800+ total photos of 1600 runners.  C’mon, man!